Little Donny Tremors
On the playground were three kids playing in a sandbox. One kid was frail, but kind, his name was Bert. Bert saw the other two kids in the box and decided he wanted to share with them. "Come play with my toys" he said, "there are toys for everyone", he exclaimed. The little girl, Hailey, whose look was cold and whose pigtails were seemingly wound too tight said, "wait a minute Bernt, toys are not for everyone. We have to assess the situation, who can play with these toys? did they earn these toys? We have to have a fair way to distribute the toys, but then changed her mind and said that "All the toys deserve to be played with," but she added, "We just have to find a way to equitably distribute the toys." Then Donny Tremors, the fattest, orangest, meanest boy in the sandbox threw sand at both of them and knocked over their toys. "No one can play with my toys!" he said, "My toys are huge, believe me, they are the best toys, no one has toys like mine and as a matter of fact, I'm going to build a wall between my toys and your toys and you're going to pay for it". Bert and Hailey looked at him stunned, "But, we don't have money to pay for your toys, we don't even really want your toys, we just want to all play together." "Wait, Hailey," said Bert, "Let me fight Donny. He's truly the worst and I've known this sandbox longer than you have. I'm older and have been coming to this park longer than you have. I can get him to leave!", he said. "Ha!" Said Hailey, you can't get him out of here. Only I can fight him out! Let me at him! I'm going to sucker punch him out of the playground!"
Donny Tremors clenched his tiny fists, turning red all over. "This used to be a great sandbox," He said. "It was the best sandbox in the world until you guys showed up and until they started letting those brown kids in the sandbox." "But Donny," the other two children exclaimed, "Those kids, have different toys, and those different toys make our Sandbox great, they make it the biggest, baddest sandbox around." At this point Donny started making a mess of the sandbox. He threw out sand, put other sand back in. He tried to organize sand by shades of the grains. He peed on all the little mounds he'd collected and pooped all over the bigger, darker ones. Bert and Hailey were powerless to stop him because they were too fucking busy arguing over who would be the best to defeat him.
Finally Bert and Hailey got up and asked their parents to remove Donny from the Sandbox. The parents refused, even while Donny was peeing and pooing all over the sandbox and all over everyone else's toys (except his own). Eventually, the park ranger came and removed Donny from the sandbox, but only after too many complaints to register, from parents and children a like. They had had it with Donny. The damage had been done. They all tried to clean the sandbox, but it was too late. It smelled like pee and poop, no matter how much they tried to clean it. All that remained was a pissed on, shitty, sand wall.
